Full Bloom

I love spring! Now that we have been in our house almost four years I get to reap the "fruits" of my labor. All of our fruit trees are producing and my flowering bushes look wonderful. I love having a hand in creating things that are beautiful.

Front yard:







Grape vines"

My David Austin roses I saved up for last year:



Apples:

Peaches:

Pears:

Welcome Harley!

We decided to try one more time. Our last dog escapade ended in heartbreak. Our redbone coon hound was very sweet and very handsome but when he learned to jump our six foot fence and visit all the neighbor dogs, we couldn't keep him anymore. Not to mention that he wasn't house broken. Paxton's idea of a good pet is one that is OK if you forget to feed it for a day, doesn't shed, doesn't make noise, doesn't ruin furniture, doesn't mess in the house, and doesn't cost anything for up keep. So, we basically could have a pet rock or a tortoise (as close to a pet rock as you can get.)

After seeing our seven year old draw picture after picture of the old dog for six months and watching her plead with tears (literally) in her eyes for a new dog. Paxton graciously relented and let us try one more time. We found a 7 month old toy rat terrier on Craig's List that was housebroken, crate trained, and non-yappy (high on Paxton's priority list). He is about 10 inches tall and weighs about seven lbs. Wish us luck this is probably our chance at owning a dog. So, here is Harley!

Memorial Day

I made it through my second memorial day. It has been almost two years to the day I found out was pregnant with Colin and 20 months since we lost him. Finally, within the last six months I have really started to feel peace. I'm not angry or questioning. I am still very sad but I have learned to control it much better.

I heard a comment a while ago that said, "If people believe in heaven, why are they sad when someone dies? Shouldn't you be happy that that person doesn't have to deal with the pain and suffering here on earth?" When I heard that I thought, "I am not grieving for my son. I am grieving for ME because I miss him. And for my Bryce who cries because he can't have is baby brother. And Shaylee who says she wants to be a big sister again and can't understand why we can't have any more kids.

But I can tell I am healing. Last year on memorial day we got to see Colin's headstone for the first time. I was dreading the whole weekend and was so sad that I was sick to my stomach. Paxton and I went early by ourselves and then his family brought our kids a bit later. I was so upset that when everyone else arrived I had to leave because I couldn't handle any more grief than my own. This year I only dreaded the hours before I got there. As I stepped out into the sunshine (a God-send literally) and saw how beautiful everything was and how many other people were celebrating someone they loved, I knew that I was a different person than last year. I welcomed my family's tears as they grieved with me.

I also have finally been able to touch a baby again. It was a year before I could hold a baby girl, a year and a half for a baby boy, and finally this weekend I held my brand new nephew. Progress... slow, but progress none the less.

This weekend I celebrated happiness. Happiness that I have live through the two years and have come out a better person for it. Happiness that I have four beautiful kids and a husband that loves me. And happiness that God loved me enough to give me this precious baby that I will get to know some day.

From Avery

Upon discovering all the bugs in the grill of our van.
Avery: Look Mom, Chantilly (our van) ate a butterfly!

My maiden name is Rollins

My Dad dug this up about one of my ancestors. It cracked me up!

James Rollins was the first of our ancestors to spell his last name Rollins instead of Rawlins. He was born in 1736 and was one of the Green Mountain Boys who, under Ethan Allen and Benedict Arnold, captured Fort Ticonderoga from the British during the Revolutionary War. Later, he lived in Dublin, New Hampshire, where he was listed in the first U.S. Census in 1790. The following anecdote appeared in the History of Dublin.

"Two members of the Baptist Church, Mr. Rollins and Mr. Riggs had a misunderstanding with regard to some dealings between them, and Mr. Riggs took occasion to call his Brother Rollins an old 'skinflint.' Mr. Rollins considered it scandalous and reported his Brother Riggs to the church for discipline. A meeting was called, and presided over by Elder Willard. Mr. Rollins stated his grievance, and the brethren discussed the matter, and gave their opinions. The Elder cautioned them about being hasty, and suggested the propriety of ascertaining the definition of the term by consulting a dictionary. A messenger returned with a dictionary, but they were doomed to be disappointed, for the word [skinflint] could not be found. In this dilemma they felt somewhat perplexed, but the Elder proposed that Brother Riggs should state to the church what he meant when he called Brother Rollins "an old skinflint." Mr. Riggs, who had been sitting in silence during the whole proceeding, rose up and said in a sonorous and lisping manner, that was natural to him, 'I meant that Brother Rollins was a downright, honest, clever man.' This must, of course, in the absence of other testimony, have been deemed satisfactory."

"History of Dublin, New Hampshire," by Levi Leonard, June 17, 1852; Published in Boston 1855.

While I am documenting family history I thought I would add a few of these shots.

My graduating class ('98)on the corner of one of the Giza Pyramids outside Cairo.



For sports we would compete with other schools in Europe and the Middle East. These were in '93 when my soccer team when to Greece.




Please don't laugh at my hair, socks, Ked's, or lack of style ; )

Quote of the week

Bryce: Mom, what is the moon made of?
Avery: I know!
Me: What is it Avery?
Avery: Green sea turtles!


Me: Bryce, it is time to come in!
Bryce (to his little girl friend that lives around the corner): Bye smushy-poo! I will see you later!
Friend: See you later Honey Bear!
Bryce (coming in the house): I will miss her so much.
Me: You have to be kidding me...

Avery: (Crying upstairs)
Me: Avery what is the problem?
Avery: I'm so sad
Me: What's the matter.
Avery: I don't have any lip gloss in my life.
Me: I so dread when you are a teenager.

Quote of the week